Ladies and gentlemen, grab your popcorn because the latest episode of “WWE SmackDown” at Madison Square Garden was more explosive than a firecracker in a dynamite factory. In the red corner, we had the freshly brewed Samoan/Tongan blend known as The New Bloodline, featuring Solo Sikoa, Tama Tonga, and Tonga Loa. They strutted down to the ring, ignoring Paul Heyman’s frantic inquiries about their AWOL teammate Jacob Fatu, like they were too cool for school.
But before Solo could let out a single “Uce,” WWE Undisputed World Champion Cody Rhodes, Randy “R-KO” Orton, and Kevin “KO” Owens stormed the ring like they were crashers at a royal banquet. The ensuing brawl was so wild, it made WrestleMania look like a polite tea party. The New Bloodline was sent scattering faster than confetti at a ticker-tape parade, with security scrambling to restore order.
Enter “SmackDown” General Manager Nick Aldis, the man with the impossible job of being the wrestling world’s babysitter. He tried to calm the chaos, but Randy Orton wasn’t having any of it. He delivered an RKO to a security guard, which is basically a WWE way of saying “Not today, pal.” Kevin Owens handed out Stunners like they were free samples, and Cody Rhodes performed a Cross-Rhodes so good, it should be in the Louvre.
With the ring littered with security guards in various states of disarray, Rhodes grabbed the mic and verbally body-slammed The New Bloodline. He called them a “makeshift, watered-down version” of the original Bloodline, the wrestling equivalent of saying they’re the store-brand cereal of wrestling factions. Solo Sikoa, whom Rhodes doesn’t see as a ‘Tribal Chief’ but more of a “seat filler,” probably had to check for burn marks after that verbal roasting.
Then, in a scene straight out of a buddy cop movie, Rhodes, Orton, and Owens were escorted backstage by police. They hopped into a car with Nick Aldis, driving away from the Garden like they had just robbed Fort Knox.