Folks, let me tell you, big things are happening in the world of AEW. We’re not just talking your average wrestling show; we’re talking Grand Slam, the Super Bowl of flips, suplexes, and fashion teases! Saturday’s “AEW Collision” unleashed a flood of match announcements that’ll make your head spin faster than a Tornado Tag Team Match. And yes, that’s happening, too!
Now, let’s start with the headline attraction: Jeff Jarrett versus “Hangman” Adam Page in what can only be described as a Lumberjack Strap Match. If you’re wondering why lumberjacks have straps now, well, this is wrestling—logic checks out the moment you step in the ring. Jarrett challenged Page on Saturday like a man who really wants to settle this feud in the most bizarrely specific way possible. You can just picture them brawling while being smacked around by ringside lumberjacks wielding leather straps. Truly a gentleman’s contest.
Next up, we’ve got Saraya and Jamie Hayter going head-to-head in a match that is basically a “no-rules-for-you, only-for-me” scenario. Classic Saraya, right? Harley Cameron read out the list of “Saraya’s Rules” with the energy of someone giving a PowerPoint presentation in the Hunger Games. Hayter better have her head on a swivel because this match might be less “wrestling” and more “how many ways can I legally cheat and still call it wrestling?”
But wait, there’s more! The Spanish God Sammy Guevara—because nothing says humility like calling yourself a deity—decided to challenge Kazuchika Okada to an Eliminator match. Dustin Rhodes was there too, probably wondering if Guevara’s bravado would get him killed or crowned. This match has the potential to be either a total blowout or the reason Guevara ends up in wrestling purgatory.
And speaking of high-stakes matches, we have MxM backstage teasing their next fashion drop—Max Caster’s jacket will be part of the runway show at “Grand Slam.” Because why wouldn’t you mix New York Fashion Week with elbow drops? Fashion statements and ring gear now go hand-in-hand, folks, because AEW is here to make sure you can’t tell the difference between a wrestling promo and a Vogue editorial.
Then there’s the little matter of “Dynamite: Grand Slam” possibly stretching into three hours. Yes, three. AEW seems to be betting on the fact that no one has ever said, “You know what, there’s too much wrestling in this show.” With eight matches already announced, there’s speculation the event will rival some epic binge-watching sessions. Bring snacks. Lots of snacks.
But don’t sleep on AEW Collision: Grand Slam, folks! This one’s coming in hot with a Tornado Trios Match featuring The Learning Tree versus The Conglomeration. This could either be a wrestling clinic or absolute chaos—either way, I’m here for it. Serena Deeb also stepped up and laid down a challenge to Britt Baker, because you can’t have a Fifth Anniversary Show without a good ol’ grudge match.
Oh, and if Guevara somehow beats Okada? He’ll be coming for the Continental Championship at the Fifth Anniversary show, officially upping the stakes for Guevara’s journey from human selfie-stick to legitimate contender.