In a stunning turn of events only rivaled by finding out your Uber driver is also your tag team partner, Bayley and Lyra Valkyria just pulled off a full gauntlet run on WWE SmackDown, punching their ticket to WrestleMania 41 for a shot at the Women’s Tag Team Titles. And yes, it was their first match as a team. Because who needs chemistry when you’ve got cardio and chaos?
The match began with Bayley and Valkyria entering first, presumably because they enjoy long walks through pain. They squared off against Zoey Stark and Shayna Baszler of the “We Hurt People Collective,” and survived thanks to Valkyria’s jackknife pin — which is both a wrestling move and what your back does if you sleep wrong.
Next came Natalya and Maxxine Dupri, where Maxxine broke out The Worm followed by an elbow drop that had flashbacks to 1999. Then she attempted a Sharpshooter, which Natalya did not authorize, leading to visible tension and one messy roll-up later — elimination. Natalya was seen yelling something that sounded like “This is why I never tag with influencers!”
Then the energy drink incarnations, Kayden Carter and Katana Chance, showed up and immediately got grounded. Valkyria hit Nightwing (a finisher, not a DC lawsuit), and the lights dimmed on Team Flip.
Michin and B-Fab were next, with Bayley planting someone (we lost track at this point) with her patented Rose Plant, which sounds like a gardening technique but hits like a sidewalk slam.
Finally, the final bosses arrived: Piper Niven and Alba Fyre, a.k.a. Chelsea Green’s Secret Her-vice agents (please don’t make me say that again). It was a brawl, a blur, and borderline illegal. The match spilled to the outside, where Valkyria tried to powerbomb Niven from the apron — bold move for a debuting tag team held together with mutual respect and questionable planning. Bayley added a dropkick, Valkyria hit a leg drop, and then boom — Rose Plant, 1-2-3.
From enemies on Raw to teammates on SmackDown, Valkyria and Bayley are now headed to WrestleMania. Let this be a lesson: when in doubt, team up with your former rival and survive five rounds of increasingly exhausted opponents.