In a shocking development that has set the wrestling world ablaze — or at least mildly warmed its analytics department — new research shows that the longer a wrestling match goes, the more fans love it… until they suddenly don’t.
That’s right, noted number sorcerer Brandon Thurston of Wrestlenomics decided to investigate whether match length actually affects Cagematch ratings — Cagematch, of course, being the IMDb of body slams, where fans rate matches between “meh” and “that cured my depression.” Spoiler alert: time does matter — at least until the match gets so long it becomes a hostage situation.
According to the study, matches that last 5 minutes or more (the minimum requirement for rating on Cagematch, and also the minimum effort for a bathroom break brawl) average a rating of around 5. That’s “it was fine” territory, usually reserved for opener squashes, or anything with Baron Corbin and no stakes.
But crank that stopwatch to 10–15 minutes, and suddenly fans start throwing 6’s and 7’s like they just found a pack of Meltzer stars in a cereal box. And at 20–30 minutes, things start getting spicy — we’re talking 7.5 to 8.0, the “this had storytelling, brother” zone.
The magic number? 35 minutes. That’s when a match hits its peak Cagematch rating — a hearty 8.5, or in wrestling terms, “epic war that should be studied in film school.”
Now here’s where the Icarus moment hits: Go past 40 minutes, and suddenly the crowd stops chanting “fight forever” and starts checking their watches like they’re waiting for a bus that may never come. Ratings dip back into the 7s, as fans start to punish matches for wasting their time unless there are 13 false finishes, 2 surprise returns, and at least one flaming table.
Brandon Thurston sums it up like this: Yes, fans love long matches — but only if those long matches earn it. Otherwise, it’s just two guys doing cardio in front of people holding up “This Is Awesome” signs out of social pressure.
So, there you have it. In wrestling, just like in dating, job interviews, and Broadway musicals: timing is everything. Unless you’re Okada, in which case 49 minutes and 3 rainmakers is a warm-up.